I'm O.K.!

Remember Splatterhouse?

I remember parents being up in arms over the game's presentation of ultra-violence, afraid that their children would don a hockey mask and run out into the street to whack people with 2x4s while praising the name of Satan. Except without the flying heads. Or shambling mounds of undead flesh. Of course, that was before Mortal Kombat made its way into the arcades, educating young children on the wonders of spine removal.

Now we have Jack Thompson, the self-proclaimed White Knight for parents against violent videogames everywhere, and a repeat offender when it comes to putting his foot in his mouth.

In a comment that was probably intended to be a joke, Thompson asked game developers to create a game about Osaki Kim, a man "swearing revenge upon the video game industry whom he is convinced contributed to his son's murder." In this statement would be a task that gamers would take to the bank.

Shortly after this proposal was handed over to the entire Internet, "Defamation of Character: A Jack Thompson Murder Simulator" was revealed. Even though it really had nothing to do with Thompson's idea, it was sure to mock publicly the sensationalist campaign he was waging upon the games industry. What's more, this game was a modification of Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas - a game at the very centre of his crusade against the video game industry. How deliciously poetic.

Bodythumper, the first original game to be based on Thompson's "modest proposal" was released shortly after. Though I think it was made out of principle than to actually create something worth playing.

With Thompson's proposal having such a stunted viewpoint on violence in videogames, I didn't think anyone could create a game that was actually, well, a game that would still be worth spending some time with. Insert a few over-the-top conventions of violent video games, make a few jokes at Thompson's expense, and call it a day.

Last week, Thompsonsoft released "I'm O.K.", the latest game to adopt Jack Thompson's design proposal. I didn't think I'd end up actually enjoying it.

After an extremely humorous cutscene that borrows heavily from the poor art direction in intros from the NES titles of yesteryear, you're given a bat and the violence begins. This is what made me think of Splatterhouse. The endless, almost nonsenical beatings that erupted into blood and gore. Enemies would drop coins that could be used to purchase bigger and better weapons between levels. But I didn't bother. I liked the bat. All of the elements of Thompson's proposal are in there: the detailed opening cutscene, the bloody trail blazed across a map of the U.S. and a visit to the fictional Paula Eibel's house.

Just when I thought it couldn't get any more gratuitous, I was asked to pee on the dancing brains of people I'd just bludgeoned to death. At this point I was speechless.

With "I'm O.K.", Thompson's sarcastic remarks have been given right back.